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Australia fifth from top in Climate malPerformance Index — “Congrats”

Climate Change Rankings, 2017 by country.

Click if you care. All 61 countries (write in the top three yourself.)

I know you’ve all been waiting for the Climate Performance Index of 2017. It’s hitting the headlines today as countries who are falling in the list get officially told off.

A group called CAN have ranked the world (well, 61 countries) according to how much carbon dioxide they emit, and how many degrees they will alter world temperature… sorry, scratch that… and how much they pander to the climate-religion. For a few moments I was proud that Australia ranked 57th out of 61.  To reach the top of the malPerformance list (I’m aiming at number 61) Australia only has to outdo Korea, Kazakhstan, Japan and Saudi Arabia. We’re all in the officially “Very Poor” and most naughty bottom rank, along with the almost-as-naughty-Canada at 55th, and Russia, Iran, and Singapore.

At the other end of the scale, the top ranked country is France at number four.

Why “four” you ask? Because there is no one, two or three. Apparently, the top three countries are imaginary. This is so fitting:

* None of the countries achieved positions one to three. No country is doing enough to prevent dangerous climate change.

Righto. Lets call the winners:  Atlantis,  Pandora, and Neverland.

It’s hard to imagine the US is only down to 43rd, just “Poor” — even after the Trump effect.

The UK (what were you Brits thinking) ranks an abysmal sixth. Sorry about that. 

I’d like to say that Australia scoring 57th was impressive so I could invert the whole list and call it the Climate Sanity Index, or Least Gullible Countries on Earth, but we all know it isn’t true — indeed the list appears pretty random. Despite Germans, Danes and Australians doing more to cripple their economies than anyone else I can think of, they scored 29th, 14th and 57th.

Consider Denmark, which broke the world record for the highest percentage of wind farm generation in 2015, (and the highest electricity charges) but can’t place better than 14th.  Germany has 25,000 wind turbines and pays practically the second highest electricity charges but ranks 29th. Australia, the largest coal exporter in the world (or close) is crippling its own coal power stations and has  run a whole state into blackness, but gets 57th. We live further from everywhere than anywhere, have the lowest population density, and bigger distances to cover, and virtually the highest population growth rate in the western world, but are still pretending we can cut our emissions by an obscene one quarter. We deserve a Golden Hairshirt Award. Instead, we’re scraping the barrel with Saudi Arabia?  How many wind farms do they have, is it zero, or have they finished the first one yet?

 *Oops on the Headline. We are not third from the top but fifth. Darn. Corrected. Sorry. I know people will be disappointed.  – Jo

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